Unfortunately, if you travel long enough, you will probably be robbed. I’m not trying to scare or dissuade anyone from traveling, it’s just a fact, and the more careful you are, the less likely is is that you will get robbed. In the last 7 months travelling both the Drunkette and I have been pick pocketed (Drunkette lost a wallet with a small amount of cash, mine was a failed attempt), had an mp3 player stolen, and had the door to our hostel room kicked in and the Drunkette’s laptop and the power cord to my laptop stolen (which is why I haven’t posted in so long). Also, the underpants gnomes have stolen almost all of my underpants, but they’re basically unstoppable. Read more...
From Cusco we took an overnight bus to the town of Puno, located on the shores of Lake Titicaca. 
First, this lake has the greatest name in the world. This has been funny the entire time I knew about it. Even now that I have been there it still makes me laugh. I fucking love it. Read more...
After the heat and the bugs of the jungle it was time for a change, so we traveled south to Cuzco.
From Lima it’s usually only about 21 hours on the bus to get to Cuzco. Unfortunately, there was road construction when we went through, so it took 25 hours. Also, the last 8 hours or so are on a steep, winding road, prompting the little kid sitting behind us to puke non-stop. Hot tip: if your kid is super car sick and puking for a couple hours, then stops (probably because there is nothing left in him to puke), please don’t give him food. The results were pretty predictable, and it made for a really long ride. Read more...
There are a lot of dogs in South America. That is actually a massive understatement. There are a literal metric fuck ton of dogs in S.A. I guess without Bob Barker reminding people to spay and neuter their pets the population just exploded. Sometimes its cool, like if you’re walking down the street, being followed by 10 dogs. It make you feel like a champion, a dog hero. Other times it’s pretty annoying, like being woken up by 20 barking dogs outside your hostel. By far the best looking dogs live further south, and the ugliest dogs are in the jungle. These pictures are of the ugliest dog I have ever seen. He was hanging out on the bank of the river in Pucallpa, Peru. 
You’ll notice that the title of this post is not past tense, and that’s awesome. Right now, at this very moment, Guns N’ Roses (that’s a wiki link and if you click it I might come to your house and junk punch you for not knowing GNR) is being played all over Peru. Get in a bus and listen to a little Appetite, go to the grocery store and you can hear Use Your Illusion (whole album). It’s on the radio, in peoples cars, and at the mall. The only thing I didn’t hear was Chinese Democracy…..
From Lima, it took an overnight bus and 5 days on a cargo boat to reach Iquitos. Getting back took about 2.5 hours on a 757 (I made up the 757 part, I have no fucking clue what kind of plane it was, but it was big and fast). You can easily book tickets from Iquitos through one of several airlines. We flew Peruvian Air for about $85 each. Well worth it to save a week of travel. Plus, you get to see the jungle from the air, which is worth it after being down there. It’s incredible. Nothing but impenetrable green jungle all the way to the horizon in every direction.
Almost every city in South America has an outdoor market where you can buy almost everything. 
Clothes, bread, meat, fish, spices, veggies, and anything else a normal person uses. The Belen market is the best in all of south America. Yeah, it’s a bold call, but it’s true. Read more...
On the edge of Iquitos, on the edge of the Amazon river, is the Belen district. Actually, it extends well 
into the river. This neighborhood starts in the river floodplain, where the lower floor of every building is flooded each wet season, and extends into the river itself in rows of floating houses. This portion of the Amazon actually rises up to 15 meters each rainy season, so everything is adapted to this huge change. The schools, churches, and public buildings are all on stilts, and there are two floating bars. There are also restaurant boats, a floating gas station, and the equivalent of a floating mini-mart. The only downside is that each house, or row of houses, has its own floating bathroom, so everyone is shitting in the river next to where they catch fish and wash their clothes. Read more...
One of my goals for this trip was to see the Amazon Jungle. I wanted to travel by boat, carry a
machete, see the wildlife. I wanted the total National Geographic experience. Well, we got what we were looking for. Read more...
After five days travelling downriver from Pucallpa, we reached Iquitos, the largest city on earth not 
connected by roads. Home to over 400,000 people, Iquitos is actually a pretty big, and pretty nice city(considering where you are). Read more...
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